Here Comes the Boom

The Theme of Rocky Meets the Spirit of School of Rock

For anyone who doesn't know the song, this film's title can be misleading. At first glance it seems like a comedy, given it's title and the fact that it stars Kevin James.  The plot, though, is hardly comedic and the film starts out in an almost depressing way.

James stars as Scott Voss, a former college wrestling star turned apathetic high school biology teacher.  He used to enjoy teaching, but life seems to have lost it's purpose and he leads a life of solitude.  Voss doesn't care much for his students or the people there, except for his friend Marty (Henry Winkler), a kind and charming music teacher.  Marty soon finds himself in trouble, though, faced with the prospect of losing his job with a baby on the way.  Scott steps in and vows to raise the money needed to save his friend's job, but soon discovers that it won't be easy.  Things get interesting, though, when he meets Hugo, a community college student who was once a mixed martial arts fighter.  When Scott discovers the money that mixed martial arts fighters make, he decides to try his hand at it.  Aided by Marty and training with Hugo, Scott enbarks on a quest to kick and punch his way to the top.  His plan is simply to advance to raise the money they need by losing all the fights he can, but things don't quite go as planned.  Along the way, though, Scott rediscovers his love of teaching and becomes something no one ever thought he could be; a role model.

This movie isn't quite the underdog triumph that Rocky is, but it still warms the heart and demonstrates the values of courage, friendship, and believing in oneself.  I personally enjoyed it much more than I thought I would.  Even though it's not a comedy, there are some laughs, particularly when Scott enters a fight with the arena speakers blasting "Holly Holy" by Neil Diamond.  Here Comes the Boom won't rank among the other underdog sports movies, but if you enjoyed Rocky, it's worth a watch.  Public school teachers especially should give it a try, although real mixed martial arts fighters may have a hard time taking it seriously.   Definitely not a bad movie, though.

3.5 Stars

Rock of Ages

Surprisingly enjoyable adaption of broadway hit reminds us of the power of rock and roll.

I've always been a die-hard rock and roll fan, from the rockabilly styles of the 50's to the 90's new wave punk.  Even so, when I saw the trailers from Rock of Ages the movie, I was suspicious.  It had a solid cast, but Tom Cruise as a rock star?  It just didn't seem right.  Cruise proved me wrong, though.  Everyone in this movie performed well.

Rock of Ages is set in the fading glory days of true rock and roll, which is to say the late 1980's.  The film's entire plot centers around a Los Angeles club titled "The Bourbon Room," a once popular concert venue that has  fallen on hard times.  Owned by rock and roll junkie Dennis Dupree (Alec Baldwin), the club is in desperate need of money and things only get worse when the city's new mayor's wife (Catherine Zeta-Jones) vows to clean up the city, which means abolishing all rock and roll venues.  Dupree's two young employees Sherrie (Julianne Hough) and Drew (Diego Boneta) both have musical dreams of their own, but Dupree isn't granting any favors...at least he doesn't want to.  All the club's hopes rest on the shoulders of aging rock star Stacee Jaxx (Tom Cruise), who got his first start there, many years ago.  Things take a turn for the worst, however, when his greedy manager (Paul Giamatti) decides to double cross Dupree and that's where things get interesting.  Adding to the mix are Russel Brand as Dupree's rock loving sidekick Ronny, and Malin Ackerman as an overly critical journalist.

Expect many performances of songs you may know, including Twister Sister's "I Wanna Rock," Poison's "Every Rose Has It's Thorn," and a show stopping rendition of Journey "Don't Stop Believing."  It really had everything, from music, to romance, to standing up for what you believe in and "sticking it to the man."  I just wish Jack Black could have had a role in this; anyone who saw his performance in "School of Rock" will understand why.  The bottom line is, though, if you love rock, you'll love this movie.  Long live rock and roll.

4 Stars.

Project X

Teen party flick is original in parts, but overall shallow.

Like every other teenager with access to a computer or television set, I was immediately interested when I first saw the trailers for Project X.  The trailers were slightly deceptive as to the movie's plot, however.  Project X is about more than just partying.

The plot centers around two high school seniors who are willing to do just about anything to make a name for themselves.  Impulsive Kosta wants very badly to lose his virginity and when his friend Thomas turns 17, he seems his friend's birthday (when his parents are out of town) as the ultimate chance to throw the ultimate party.  Because they are both rather un-popular, he has no idea if anyone will actually come to the party, so he views the entire undertaking as a project.  This he titles "Project X." Thomas is somewhat weary of his friend's ideas and insists that they keep the party small. Kosta is quick to agree to this, but when he sets to work getting the word out via social media, the guest list starts to get bigger and bigger.  When the actual party begins, things start off slow, but once the guests start arriving, things get out of hand..fast!  Before long, both the house and yard are completely filled with teenagers (mostly teenagers that is) and despite complains and threats from the neighbors, the party rages on.  Along the way, both boys learn some valuable life lessons; mainly that the choices you make can easily have everlasting consequences.  This isn't a bad movie, but ultimately its overall message seems to be that being popular in high school is worth sacrificing absolutely everything.  This is a good teen movie, but don't go looking for any moral substance.

3 Stars

The Three Stooges

Early comedy trio slandered by 21st century culture.

I grew up watching the original Three Stooges and naturally when I heard they were making a modern three stooges movie, I was happy at first.  My joy quickly turned to doubt, however, when I learned that this readaption was going to be set in the modern, 21st century.  It just didn't seem right, but when this film was released, I watched it, mostly out of respect for the original stooges.  Now I wish I hadn't.

This modern retelling begins with three babies being dropped off at an orphanage run by nuns.  The identity of the person who did the dropping is never reveled and the boys, named Moe, Curly, and Larry grow up in the orphanage.  It should come as no surprise that they are never adopted.  The three troublesome boys grow up into men who never leave the orphanage, that is until they learn that all their troublemaking has thrown their home into financial ruin.  Vowing to come up with the thousands of dollars needed to pay off the bank they venture into the outside world, but quickly discover that earning money in the 21st century is difficult, particularly when you have no trade or education.  All the same, the lovable trio of dimwits presses on and meets with many adventures, getting mixed up in a murder scandal involving a childhood friend of their's along the way.

Fans of the original stooges can expect all the usual stunts and catchphrases, but beyond that, this film has little to offer.  Simply put, The Three Stooges should not be put in the 21st century and none of them, repete none of them, should ever appear on Jersey Shore.  Ever. Don't watch this movie expecting to be impressed, particularly if you are, or were, a fan of the original stooges.

2.5 Stars

The Amazing Spider-Man

Early superhero remake has its moments, but ultimately falls short of original.

Spider-Man was first brought to the big screen by director Sam Raimi in 2002.  Raimi's version of the web slinging superhero stared Tobey Macguire as Peter Parker, a nerdy, socially inept high school student.  On a class tip, he was bitten by a radioactive lab spider and thus the story began.  Not quite halfway through the film, Peter graduated high school and set out to make his way in the adult world.  Around the same time that Peter grew into his web-slinging powers, his friend Harry Osbourne's billionaire scientist father, Norman was working hard to save the company he created from men who wanted very much to see him fail.  When his attempt to test his latest project went wrong, he became Green Goblin, the foe Peter would spend the movie battling.  Kirsten Dunst co-stared as the beautiful Mary-Jane Watson, Peter's love interest while James Franco also appeared as Harry Osbourne, Norman's son and Peter's best friend.  J.K. Simmons gave a screen stealing performance as J. Jonah Jamison, the quick tempered editor of The Daly Bugel, a small newspaper where Peter went to work as a photographer.

This more modern version shows Peter in a similar stage of his life, but focuses more on one specific part of his life.  Peter (portrayed by Andrew Garfield) spends this entire movie in high school and never takes a job at any newspaper.  The character of J. Jonah Jamison is written out completely, as is the character of Harry Osbourne, although Norman is credited as the founder of Oscorp Industries.  Mary-Jane is completely absent from this film, but in her place is Gwen Stacy (Emma Stone), a smart and talented girl from Peter's school.  As luck would have it, however, Gwen's father (Dennis Leary) happens to be the very police captain who wants to put Spider-Man away for good.  The original film had no mention of Peter's parents, but this one begins with him being dropped off at his aunt and uncle's house to live "for a little while."  When he happens across his father's old briefcase, he discovers a photo of his father and another scientist.  His uncle Ben reveals this man to be Dr. Curtis Conners, his father's former partner.  When Peter sneaks into Oscorp Industries to learn more about him, he is bitten by a spider which of course gives him his powers.  This movie didn't quite top the original, but it is still interesting enough to be worth watching.  Even fans of the original Spider-Man films, like myself, should enjoy this.  Its not a bad movie at all, just not quite as good as the original.

4 Stars

Jack and Jill

Norbit meets The Nutty Professor meets any bad Sandler flick.

As much as I typically enjoy Adam Sandler's work, I was not impressed with Jack and Jill.  I am not opposed to raunchy and crude humor by any means, but this movie was too stupid even for me.  As talented as he is, Adam Sandler should stick to male roles.  Some men were not meant to play women.

Sandler stars as Jack Sadlestein, a working class kid from the Bronx turned wealthy Southern California advertising executive.  He has a beautiful wife (Katie Holmes) and two great kids; his life on the whole is sweet except for one person; his clingy, unattractive, socially awkward twin sister Jill (also played by Sandler).  Jack can't stand Jill and dreads the her anual visit every thanksgiving.  Jill transforms Jack's perfect world completely upside down with her outrageous demands and crazy stunts, from riding a jetski through his pool to parading around his home in her undergarments.   He can't stand hosting her but when the lonely Jill decides not to leave, things get really out of hand.  To cure his sister's lonliness, Jack tries to hooking her up with a man through online dating (Craigslist in specific), but she manages to drive away the only man willing to date her.  Things seem bleak, but when the infamous Al Pacino falls for Jill, Jack begins to wonder if maybe his embarrassing sister might just be good for something after all.  Things take a turn for the worst, however, when Jill falls for Jack's charming gardener and despite her brother's urgings, does not return Pacino's sentiment.

This movie is painful to watch in some scenes (specifically the ones that show Adam Sandler in a woman's bathing suit).  If you enjoy bad movies this just be enjoyable, but it depends; just how stupid of a movie are you looking for?

2.5 Stars

Avengers

The one superhero movie to rule them all.

In the past few years, there have been many superhero movies, some spectacular, others awful.  Even superheros are only as super as the actors who play them; from Toby McGuire's epic performance as Spider-Man to Ben Affleck's "blind" performance as Daredevil.  This movie, however, did not have a bad actor in it.  Marvel Avengers was super in every way.

Many of Marvel Comic's "Avengers" have had their own movies over the years and in this movie they all came together.  It features Chris Evans as strong, patriotic Steve Rogers (aka Captain America), Robert Downy Jr. as the flashy, wise-cracking Tony Stark (aka Iron Man) and Chris Hemsoworth as deep-voiced, kingly Thor.   Although there have been two Incredible Hulk movies in the past decade, neither one has been worth the time or money that went into making it.  In The Avengers,  Mark Rufolo outdoes both Eric Bana and Edward Norton as Dr. Bruce Banner and needless to say, as the Hulk himself.  Samuel L. Jackson is very good as well as Nick Fury and Scarlet Johansen shines as Black Widow.  Adding to the mix is Lokki, the younger brother of Thor, who descends upon Earth and instantly begins causing chaos, killing many people and laughing about it as he goes.  Directly after declaring war, Fury gathers the Avengers aboard a floating air-fortress but before they get very far, things start going wrong...fast.  Many personal conflicts arise as personalities clash.  Steve Rogers and Tony Stark don't quite see eye to eye, nor do Thor and Fury.  Dr. Banner does everything possible to control his temper, but it becomes very hard when Lokki is taken aboard.  This movie truly has something for everyone, action, humor and even romance.  The grand finale is truly incredible, with feats from every single hero.  There's even a laugh now and then.  This is not a movie anyone should miss.  See if in 3D if you can, but if you can't its still worth seeing.

5 Stars.